Have You Ever……..

Have you ever been so hurt by a person because they have completely blocked you out of their life, that the hurt turns to anger? Trying to figure out what you have done that was so wrong that they don’t even wanna share their life as a friend with you anymore. Then with that anger you lash out? Saying and doing anything just to hurt that person the way you are hurting? Instead of helping your situation by showing that person how hurt you are, you do the opposite and push them further away.

That’s the place that I am right now. I have been hurt so bad and left without even a place to live that one minute I am crying and the next minute I am shouting. I am not trying to put the blame souly on just him but I feel like that he has no sypthany for my situation at all! I don’t think I could lay my head down at night and go to sleep knowing that someone I loved was living on the streets without even a car to sleep in. How could someone be so cold? And not only that, Block that person from being able to reach out to me knowing that the love between us was still there.

Is this kind of behavior normal or am I just over reacting and need to give up and let go on something that I have longed for way too long? Will these feelings of abamdonment and despiration ever go away? I hope so. Will the person that made me feel this way ever really know how I feel and actually be sorry for the pain he has caused me? Or will he continuely blame me for all that happened without owning up to his part that he played in our relationship failing?

Regardless if we ever become friends again, I hope that he comes to realize where he was wrong and what he could have done to change the out come so at least he don’t make the same mistakes with the next woman in his life. I really do hope he finds the happiness he deserves because I know beneath that hard exterior lies a gentle heart dying to be loved! If only he would let all those wounds from the past heal so he could let go and move on without the guards up around that beautiful heart I know is there.

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